Quiet…

I love this time of day — early in the morning, while it’s still dark and my family sleeps.  It leaves me time with my thoughts.  It’s my last day off for the week and I’m starting it with a Pilates class.  And boy do I need to get back to it.  I certainly indulged and enjoyed over the Christmas break.

I realized after seeing our family pictures, which I love, by the way, that though I have come so far (-65 pounds) I still have so far to go (another 60 pounds), and now is not the time to rest upon my laurels.

I’m coming to realize that this will be my life-long struggle.  Sticking with fitness and eating well.  Who am I kidding — this has always been my struggle.  And I’m luckier than many in that I have an athletic history.  I have the capacity to be fit, working out is not foreign to me, exercise can be a serious passion of mine.  Eating still needs work.  I still love all things bread and that combined with sugar is my downfall.  I need more protein in my life — but as luck would have it — I have an aversion to chewing protein and not to carbs.  Of course.  So until I can reset my mouth and my attitude, I think I will do a solids fast and stick to protein shakes for a day or two.  It will help me shed the 4 pounds I gained over the WEEKEND, and make me appreciate protein once again.

Frank and I are getting excited for the house.  Not for the upfront expenses that come with a new home, but for the adventure of planning out the things we want in it.  I finally found a couch I think I love for the family room and Frank is working out the sound system for the home theater room.  And we both feel blessed to be in a position to discuss either.  There was a time for us, like for most, that we couldn’t rub two nickels together.  We’ve worked hard over the years and feel ready for this next adventure.  I cannot wait.

Jake left for Denver yesterday.  I was sad to see him go, but proud of him and his ability to make it on his own.  He is looking at moving in with a roommate at the end of his lease, just to make his money go further.  There’s no breathing room at the end of the month for his pocketbook.

I took initiative yesterday and reached out to the pastor of our new church.  I have some questions — not about the church or their doctrine — that’s pretty straight forward — but I’ve always had issues with the Trinity.  Always.  And I’ve been on both sides of the coin.  One for all and all for one, and three separate entities…now I just sit in confusion.  So I feel ready to hash it out and have the conversation with someone who may just know more than I do on the subject.  Or at least someone who can make the Nicene creed make more sense come paragraph two.  I don’t know why sorting this out is so important to me at this time, but it seems to be.  So, my spiritual journey continues.  I’ll keep you posted.